Ok, so I lied about being a man
Look just be glad I'm still attracted to you
No, I don't expect you to still go out with me
But can we still sleep together?
If you insist on going away
At least take your smelly underwear with you
I don't appreciate the way you soil the bed
Especially when I have to sleep in it
So, does my ambiguous sex make you uncomfortable
I could wear a strap on to ease your mind
If you'd just calm down for a second
You'd see that it's actually a very interesting viewpoint
Sure, kick me out if you want to
I don't mind living on the street
I can turn tricks for lots of money
Not everybody is as uptight as you
A year from now you'll see me and wonder
How I survived in the street all alone
But you'll be pushing a stroller with a kid in it
And living with a well-off man
I don't mind if you start wearing cardigans
And sweatpants with buttons up the sides
You can join the Rotary club for all I care
It's certainly no skin off my nose
Will you enjoy your bridge games at the home?
I think you'll miss my mysterious pelvis
It's my understanding most old men are incontinent
Not that you care about the urinary tract